Daily Cartoon! THE AVENGERS: EARTH’S MIGHTIEST HEROES: S.2,E.13: “Along Came A Spider”

What’s up everybody? I haven’t done this since Adam West died, but I’ve done some baseball in between that I hope you’ve been enjoying. In the interest of keeping up with

current events, though, I thought it was high time to do another cartoon review to coincide with the new release of SPIDER-MAN HOMECOMING. Spoiler, since there’s no podcast anymore, it’s good! I’d give it a…hmmm…quadruple main man! Four stars! It’s not a perfect movie, but I think they did about as good a job with re-introducing Spidey to fans since he’s been the odd man out during this entire MCU build.

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Ep. 47: ROBOCOP

It’s a brand new episode to begin your work week! This week, we’re talking all things ROBOCOP! We’ve both been huge fans since childhood and you really can’t believe just how expansive the Robocop universe is! We’re also talking more NHL Playoffs, the Mets falling apart, Gomez finally finishes the latest Netflix Marvel series, Iron Fist, binge culture and the ESPN layoffs and how the affects the profession moving forward along with mirroring retail jobs. It’s a thought-provoking episode of the show. Enjoy!

Ep. 46: Purple Rain

We talk about all of the things this week! Our “Previously On…” segment is a clip from the original THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS. We begin with some follow-up on the NHL Playoffs and why Joe says the comparison between Sidney Crosby and Alexander Ovechkin should be put to rest. Ovechkin then gets compared to Carmelo Anthony and the guys talk about how important a championship is to a Hall of Fame resume. They talk about the semi-recent fad of star players bouncing around on teams near the end of their careers to chase a ring. Dan Marino versus Drew Brees: who you got? Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush buy the Marlins. We update you on Jimmer Fredette and Stephon Marbury’s Chinese Adventures. Would you like to be the MVP of China? Joe wants to be the White Mamba. Jimmer Fredette vs. Eric Thames: who you got? Is Ichiro the real hit king? How do we fix baseball? Gomez is a stupid liar. We watch and discuss the greatness of PURPLE RAIN and remember the genius of Prince. Do Morris Day and Jerome steal the show? Apollonia vs. Samantha Fox: who you got? Prince’s dad wants to talk to Samson. Prince makes Batman sound sexy. Should Taylor Swift do the soundtrack for BLACK PANTHER? Prom night dumpsters. NKOTB vs. The Time: who you got? Don’t send us angry nudes. Prince is dead ass about being purified in the waters of Lake Minnetonka. Prince lives the gimmick…and also at home. Prince vs. Lamar Latrell: who you got? Joe wants a brass waterbed. How did the new Netflix show 13 REASONS WHY get made? Poor Wendy and Lisa. Did The Kid spend the rest of his life in that club? How does the movie stack up on our main man standings? PURPLE RAIN vs. SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER: who you got? The Big Finish: Top 3 Wrestling Managers! Joe tells some old wrestling locker room stories including when he wrestled legendary tag team: DEMOLITION! Like us on Facebook facebook.com/carjoemez! Twitter: @CarJoeMez, e-mail CarJoemez@gmail.com.

Daily Cartoon! ARCHER: S.5, E.1: “White Elephant”

Welcome back to the Friday edition of the Daily Cartoon! I apologize that this is coming already late in the day, but sometimes these things happen. Quick programming note: this feature will go from being daily to weekdays only. I appreciate everybody coming back day after day, but it’s quite the commitment and I have other irons in the fire to attend to as well. Of course, I will be plugging any and all of that here once those take off.

This isn’t ending, by any means. I love doing this and will continue to do so. I also may introduce a new wrinkle into things to have something a bit different coming up soon too. I just need to free up some time to do all the things I like.

OK, so happy Friday and all that jazz. Today we’re watching Archer which is something I decided to watch on my own. Truth be told, I know a few people who love this show, but I’ve never seen it. It’s always one of those shows that I want to start watching and I mean to, but then I get lazy and don’t want to put in the commitment to starting a new show when I can just watch Parks And Rec again and fall asleep to the sweet sounds of Andy Dwyer singing “Bye Bye Li’l Sebastian”.

The reason I picked this episode is pretty simple. Lately, all the shows I’ve been watching have had pretty short runs or were produced for syndication so there was never a chance to see what works and what doesn’t and to make adjustments to the show whether it be in characters or tone.

Archer not only adjusted, they changed the entire fucking show around. What was a spy program for the first four seasons apparently turned into Archer Vice for Season 5 and dealt with the characters selling blow. That’s a pretty big fucking adjustment, I’d say.

So I just wanted to see how they did it. Was it something they explained? Or did they just show up for the first episode of the season like, “Hey! We’re about drugs now!” I want to know these things.

That’s where we stand. And with all of that said, let’s watch a cartoon.

Archer: S.5, E.1: “White Elephant”

Originally Aired: January 13, 2014

Plot:

We’re greeted by Archer as he’s walking into ISIS headquarters with some beautiful music playing in the background. It’s a slow and deliberate intro with all the other characters making quick appearances until he arrives in his mother’s office and – SUHPRISE – there’s a huge explosion that take us into the opening credits and theme song.

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When we return, there’s a massive shootout happening in the office. Bullets are whizzing by everywhere as Archer tries to figure out Beaker from The Muppets’ boss. After one of the opposing “storm ninjas” – as they’re called by Cheryl – gets shot, it is revealed that they’ve been battling FBI agents. Probably not the best idea.

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The whole team is cuffed and taken in and Malory – Archer’s mom – tells everybody that she’ll take care of things, but nobody should say a word. As everybody is getting interrogated separately, they immediately all start giving up anything they can think of except for Archer and Lana who just get into a fight with each other to sucker in the FBI agents before knocking them out, freeing themselves and then heading out to free the rest of the team. They gather up everybody before crashing into the room to save Malory last who is putting the finishing touches on a deal that gives the entire crew immunity.

I’m really shortening things here, but what is said as they go back and forth from all the interrogation rooms is absolutely stupendous. This show is fucking something else. So Malory gets them all off the hook and the FBI won’t take any of the blame for having killed their co-worker, Brett Bunsen to which Archer lets out a huge celebratory yell because hearing that name reminded him that Beaker’s boss on The Muppets was Dr. Bunsen Honeydew.

The crew goes back to the ISIS offices to get whatever of their stuff is left and start pondering what they’ll do for jobs and money and health insurance. Cheryl is planning on being a big-time country singer. Archer says he’ll play professional lacrosse. Pam openly wonders about getting back into underground fighting. Lana tells everybody that none of that is possible.

At this point, Archer says they should discuss the elephant in the room and hits the switch to open the secret compartment behind Malory’s desk to display literally…not figuratively, but literally a ton of cocaine. The theorize that it’s probably worth between $50-60 million and Malory says starting a cartel shouldn’t be that hard since Mexicans are able to do it.

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Archer then drifts off into a wonderful fantasy sequence about the entire crew running their cocaine cartel before snapping out of it and whispering, “Archer Vice”.

Final Thoughts:

I’ve summarized quite a bit here, but trust me, this was fucking stupendous. Like I suddenly want to binge watch this whole fucking season right now.

This was clever, witty, funny and whatever other glowing adjectives I can bestow upon this. I love that they just decided to completely change the direction of the show and the way they did it was wonderful.

I will definitely continue to watch me some Archer. I guess I should start from the beginning, but that sounds rather imposing since there’s already something like 6 seasons on Netflix. Oh well. I’ll just have to jump in and get started.

If you’re already a fan of this, I’m sure you’re excited to see my excitement. If you’ve never seen it or wondered if it’s something you should ever give a chance, go do it. Give it that chance and watch. I’m assuming the rest of the series is along the same tone as this episode and – if so – this show may become one of your new favorite shows. So get on the Netflix and start rolling through episodes.

Have a great weekend and I’ll see you on Monday.

❤ Joe

Daily Cartoon! Super Mario Bros. Super Show: E.48: “Flatbush Koopa”

Welcome to the Sunday edition of the Daily Cartoon on Car JoeMez! Came across this one on Netflix the other day and thought it would be fun to watch so BAM here it is.

Before we going, listen to the podcast, The Car JoeMez Show. New episodes available weekly on iTunesSoundcloud or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen, subscribe to the show, leave us a review on iTunes or Stitcher of like and leave comments on Soundcloud. All of that helps.

Today we’ll be watching The Super Mario Bros. Super Show which debuted in 1989 and ran for 65 episodes. This was at peak Nintendo mania and if you put Mario on anything people would watch and buy it at that point. Seriously, there were some action figures of NES characters, of course, but they even had a fucking Nintendo cereal! Think I’m joking?

That shit was 100% real. And probably made a gazillion dollars.

Obviously, we were begging for more of our favorite Nintendo heroes, so eventually they gave us this show which – speaking strictly from memory – was a syndicated deal that would give you a different episode everyday after school. Fridays were special events as – in place of a Mario and Luigi adventure – you were treated to The Legend of Zelda and were walked through the trials and tribulations of Link. If I’m remembering that incorrectly, feel free to let me know, but these things take long enough to write as is.

My brother and I used to love the shit out of this show. We would even get our mom to buy us the commercial VHS videos because they were available in that Troll Books thing you would get at school. Remember that? Like every month, you’d get a circular, basically, of just books and then you’d beg your parents to buy everything for you?

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You totally remember this. Don’t try to play coy with me, bro.

Anyway, they started putting Mario VHS tapes in this and we had a bunch. I think my brother may still have those actually. I should ask him. Not that I want them or anything, I just want to know if they still exist. They survived a lot of spring cleaning and donations over the years because they were in a little-used, low-traffic closet that we’d honestly forget we even had most of the time. Memories.

This series is on Netflix now and I just picked an episode with a short title so it didn’t clutter the header as much. That’s the kind of exact algorithm that goes into selecting the shows, folks. Let’s get to it.

The Super Mario Bros. Super Show: E.48: “Flatbush Koopa”

Originally Aired: November 23, 1989

Plot:

We start off with the sick rap intro that’s partially live-action with WWE Hall of Famer, Captain Lou Albano, in the role of Mario. In all honesty, if you’re not excited to watch this show after that, you may not have a soul.

The live-action portion begins with Mario and Luigi being awoken from their sleep as a neighbor is practicing their opera singing. They don’t know how they’re going to handle dealing with all this singing so while they think about it, we transition to the cartoon.

The cartoon begins with a parade in the Mushroom Kingdom because the Bros have finally defeated Koopa and sent him packing. Everybody is hyped and probably getting laid tonight. With this huge task taken care of, Mario and Luigi decided to get back to Brooklyn. Of course. They hope in the open drain and – BING – back in Brooklyn!

Unfortunately for them, as they take in the sights of their hometown, they see the Statue of Liberty, but the head has been replaced with that of Koopa! Turns out, leaving the Mushroom Kingdom was all a big ruse by Koopa to take over the Bros’ home. Koopa and the Koopa Troopers start changing all the signs in town to reflect some take on Koopa. Coney Island? Koopa Island. Brooklyn? Kooplyn.

Honestly, in 1989 Brooklyn could have used a refresher like this. I suppose I’d feel different had I lived there, but let’s call a spade a spade: fuck Brooklyn.

Back in the Mushroom Kingdom, Toad and the Princess are bored AF now that Koopa’s been run off so they decide to jump in the pipe and visit the Brooklyn Kingdom. And it’s not a moment too soon as Mario and Luigi are desperate for some help in beating off some Koopa Troopers. Princess says since the Bros. helped save her homeland, she’s going to do the same for them. What a woman. Ride or die.

They lure Koopa back into the Mushroom Kingdom by stealing his scepter that turns shit into bricks. So Brooklyn has been saved, but the battle for the Mushroom Kingdom will continue.

Back to live-action, Mario and Luigi are unclogging a toilet, but can’t even concentrate because Opera Lady is still having at it. So, Luigi tells us to watch scenes from the next The Legend of Zelda while they think of another plan to deal with her.

This episode looks fierce. Link’s a ghost and Zelda is a sassy broad who doesn’t like his shit. Link has a bit of a Corey Feldman vibe to him. I wouldn’t deal with his shit either.

Back in live-action, the Mario Bros. fight fire with fire and begin singing themselves until the neighbor finally agree to stop just to not have to hear them anymore. Hit the music because it’s time to do the Mario!

Final Thoughts:

If you’re not familiar, “Do The Mario” was the end credits song and dance you would do with Capt. Lou leading you through it. It was rad.

As far as the show, I’m going to say positive things! The live-action stuff is cheesy, sure, but it’s in small doses and serves its purpose. The actual cartoon was pretty OK too. If you’re not familiar with the Mario characters, that’s on you, but seeing them here was fun and despite a brief absence from the Mushroom Kingdom, the battle we all know and love continues.

This episode went by pretty quick for me and I had fun with it. Not everything needs to be Shakespeare. This was fine for what it was and I certainly see why I loved this as a kid.

Thumbs up.

Thanks for reading.

❤ Joe

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Daily Cartoon! Voltron: Legendary Defender: S.1,E.1: “The Rise of Voltron”

Welcome back to your daily cartoon on Car JoeMez! Before we get started, remember to check out the weekly podcast The Car JoeMez Podcast on iTunesSoundcloud and other outlets where podcasts are gotten. Remember to like, subscribe and leave some positive reviews to help us build that listener base so we can keep doing fun little things like cartoon reviews and other projects. Like karate in the garage.

Now that the business is out of the way, we’re doing something a bit different today. Still a cartoon, but a much more modern one that what we’ve been watching. Last year, Netflix revived the Voltron franchise with a brand new series produced by DreamWorks. Voltron: Defender of the Universe was a huge deal when I was a kid. I remember having toys and RC robots, but when I think back, I don’t remember much of the actual show.

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I do, however, remember being an angst-filled teen when Mighty Morphin Power Rangers came out and I was the douche yelling to anybody who would listen that it was just a Voltron rip-off. I was the kind of teen that would probably boo John Cena because I thought it was cool. Spoiler: it’s not cool and John Cena is the best.

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I have legitimately never seen an episode of this new incarnation so this will be a brand new viewing through fair and balanced eyes. I’m actually looking forward to this. All episodes seem to be the normal 22-23 minutes except for the premiere which has a run time of 68 minutes. What that means is that this review will probably get a little lengthy. And seeing as how most of my reviews run around 1,200 words for a 22 minute episode, this has every possibility to get out of control. But if I’m going to watch a show I’ve never seen, why not start at the beginning and seeing if it’s worth continuing.

Now that we’ve burned over 300 words just introducing this, let’s get to the cartoon!

Voltron: Legendary Defender: S.1, E.1: “The Rise of Voltron”

Originally Released: June 10, 2016

Three space explorers are on an expedition to one of Pluto’s moons trying to find evidence of intergalactic life when they are attacked and captured by the evil Galra empire. The three are referred to as “primitive scientists” and are thrown into the Galra’s prisons.

We cut to one year later where three students (Lance, Hunk and Pidge) at Galaxy Garrison – a school to train space pilots and engineers – completely bomb a simulator rescue mission. Lance, the pilot, is reprimanded and told that he’s only in the class because a better pilot was kicked out of the program which opened a spot for him.

After curfew, Lance decides to build some team camaraderie by sneaking out with Hunk and Pidge. Pidge, however, is found outside with some fancy computer equipment scanning the airwaves trying to find messages and information having to do with the lost space exploration crew from a year ago.

While they’re out there, an alien spacecraft comes hurtling down and crashes. The school’s security immediately cordons it off and it turns out that the person on board is Shiro, one of the lost explorers. He is talking about alien invasions and that they’re in great danger, but everybody just thinks he’s crazy.

The three kids are trying to figure out a way to run down and rescue Shiro who is apparently a famous explorer when another kid is shown causing a distraction and sneaking in to do the same. This turns out to be Keith who Lance considers his rival and is the pilot who dropped out of the Garrison that opened a spot for Lance.

Together, the four kids rescue Shiro and escape. Shiro struggles to remember the details of the past year, but Keith fills him in on some energy source he’s been studying. The word “Voltron”keeps coming up in Shiro’s head and Pidge’s research and they all agree that it’s a weapon they need to find before the Galra does.

This is a good time to take a Zack Morris timeout.

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OK, so Shiro is this renown space guy and, basically, he gets kidnapped by four kids and he’s all just, “Whoa, thanks for saving my bacon back there”??? If I was Shiro, I’d be like, “Where the fuck are your parents?” or “Why aren’t you in school?” or even better, “Where the white women at?”

But whatever. Nobody cares about what I would do.

OK. Time in.

They new fivesome goes to a cave that Keith’s been finding at the heart of the energy source he’s been tracking.There’s carvings of lions on all the walls, but when Lance presses his hand against them, they activate. A tunnel opens that drags the group to the bowels of the cave and it’s there that they find their first lion.

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The blue lion basically goes on auto pilot and heads into space where it is immediately met by an alien ship. The same alien ship that captured Shiro a year ago. The aliens chase the lion until a mysterious wormhole opens and takes the lion in then closes before the aliens can continue following.

The lion leads them to planet Altea which nobody knows of and touches down at a castle. The cautiously scan the castle until finding a control room where they are met by Princes Allura and Coran, her royal adviser, who have been in suspended animation for 10,000 years. Allura tells the story of how her father, King Alfor and his kingdom, was overtaken by Emperor Zarkon and the Galra. To keep the power of Voltron out of Zarkon’s hands, Alfor had hidden the five lions that form Voltron all around the solar system.

OK, despite some early convenience and silliness, I’m fucking with this now.

The group immediately concludes that Zarkon will come know that he knows the blue lion has been unearthed. Allura says that the lion picks its pilot. Kind of like how the wand picks the wizard in Harry Potter. Despite not having met any of the rest of the lions, Allura basically assigns a lion to each of our new heroes. Lance keeps the blue, Pidge gets green, Hunk yellow, Keith red and Shiro the leader will get black. The group splits and goes hunting for the other lions since Allura had what amounts to lion lo-jack installed in her brain by her father before he was killed.

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To save time, the crew finds the green and yellow lions easy enough, but the red lion is being held on a Galra ship. Obviously, our gang heads to said ship to free the red lion, but things become more complex when Pidge reveals that his father and brother were also on the expedition with Shiro a year ago and could still be held captive on the ship.

Keith is able to take control of the red lion while Shiro and Pidge free whatever prisoners they can find, but no sign of Pidge’s father or brother. This seems like something that will play out for a while. On the bright side, gaining control of the red lion now allows them to gain access to the black lion which is held locked in Princess Allura’s castle until all of the other lions could be found.

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With control of all the lions, our palladins try to form Voltron to thwart the attacks on Altea by the Galra. There’s just one problem: they have no fucking idea how to do so. Just when it looks as if their inexperience will cost them everything, Shiro gives an inspirational speech and the lions take control to form the ultimate weapon: Voltron, defender of the universe.

With the power of Voltron unleashed, the palladins are able to destroy the Galra and send them packing. While a great victory, this is just the beginning of a great war to be had. Many more action-packed adventures are to come.

Final Thoughts:

I’m often critical of newer style animation because I think it looks too computer-generated, but this show walks a nice line with its smooth animation and coloring. The overall look and feel of this production were terrific and I was happy to see that.

As for the story, I’m really, really impressed. OK sure, near the beginning when they’re setting things up, some meetings or moments are just too convenient, but they don’t bog down or draw anything away from where we’re going. It’s silly, it happens and we move on and forget about it.

By the time we meet Princess Allura on Altea, I was completely invested in the show and – while I took for granted that they’d eventually form Voltron and win the day – still had a feeling of tenseness as things were looking bleak for our heroes.

All in all, I absolutely loved this debut episode for the updated series and will definitely be watching the rest of it as my busy, busy schedule allows. Like I said earlier, this is a Netflix series and there’s actually two seasons available now for your viewing enjoyment.

If you were a fan of the original, I see no reason that you wouldn’t be into this re-make and if you’ve got youngsters who are unfamiliar with the previous iterations or maybe even are unfamiliar yourself, this was a definite score for a first episode. Go check it out and have some fun like I did.

❤ Joe